Struggles with boundary discovery

For easier reference, let's give this protocol a name.

I tend to think of it as either Boundary discovery or Boundary alignment.

We can understand Boundary discovery as the process of exploring, in real time, how much emotional charge, informational depth, and engagement another person can comfortably hold

— and to adjust before that capacity is exceeded or underused.

Or, in simpler terms:

It's about understanding where people stop saying yes — before they have to say no.

When it comes down to it, it's about assessing relational availability.

Boundary discovery as a concept should enable us to collect data, test, and adjust to another person’s current capacity for depth, intensity, and engagement.

Thinking about it less in terms of action, and more in terms of a protocol makes it more:

1. teachable
2. developable
3. non-binary
4. alive