After an intense weekend, people often have new language and a strong experience in the room. A few weeks later I see the same patterns again. Only with nicer words around them.
I care more about people getting to return to the same material over time, than about everything being finished before they walk out the door. Ambiguity has to be allowed to stand for a while. How you stand in responsibility and relationships has to change in practice — not only in a workshop.
What I look for is whether something has settled. Not whether the weekend felt like a breakthrough.
Challenges I run into
Work and family often want fast change. Clients want to hear what people “took away.” Then it becomes tempting to finish everything in the session.
What is not finished does not get to sit. Contradictions get polished away so the program looks successful.
From the outside it looks like development. Inside it feels empty. New language around old habits.
What I think matters to watch for
Participants need to be able to come back to the same material over weeks and months. Not only summarize a weekend.
We have to stand two things being true at once, and that the person is not finished. If we only inspire past what is difficult, we get atmosphere. Not something that sticks.
I would rather judge how people stand in responsibility later, than how strongly the breakthrough was described at the end of the course.
How Relatable fits in
Relatable gives room to hold what is unfinished and contradictory, and to come back to it over time.
That looks like the way I want to work: come back to the same material — not require that you are finished after one intense session.